The Blood Gulch Campaigns
by PMOHWinters
Summary: A comprehensive account of the battles our fellow soldiers are fighting on the other side of the galaxy. Oneshot.


**The Blood Gulch Campaigns**

A comprehensive account of the battles our fellow soldiers are fighting on the other side of the galaxy.

**Authors**: Captain Karla Wellings and Sergeant Ronald Paccone

**Introduction: **After a short inspection of the front in another section of the galaxy, the authors feel that there is much vital information not reaching the command staff, and that certain and pressing issues need to be brought to attention. This report is an account on the conditions these soldiers face every day, and the authors feel that it is imperative that changes are to be made quickly.

_**Battle Etiquette**_

**Observations:** To tell the truth, the authors were not impressed when they first reviewed the soldiers stationed here. The majority of the soldiers were extremely young, ranging from 13 to 16 years old, with older (though not quite as mature) soldiers sprinkled in. Most of these soldiers seem to lack any kind of battlefield discipline or order, and are often left to their own devices, with no obvious chain of command to order them around.

Many of the soldiers here have the tendency to whine, as if this entire war was a game to them. The most common complaints and expletives were directed toward snipers, and what these soldiers deem "campers". The authors find this difficult to believe, as sniping and defensive holding actions are completely legitimate battlefield tactics. This issue is not restricted to just our troops either. In an experiment, the authors selected a robust weapons loadout, scouted an easily defensible position, and held that area for the entire battle. Though the authors' skills in the Covenant language are rudimentary at best, it was not hard to imagine what the enemy was yelling at us as we shot them to pieces.

Another issue is the lack of any coordinated teamwork. As stated before, there is no clear chain of command within the army structure here. As a result, troops often wander the battlefield on their own accord. It is extremely difficult trying to achieve any kind of objective in the battle while fellow troops are scattered around the map doing other tasks, ranging from sniping, hunting, eating, sleeping, and possibly even sexual acts, though this suspicion remains unconfirmed.

Also noted is the lack of any kind of verbal restraint between soldiers. The authors have lost count of how many expletives, racist remarks, and insults against family members have been uttered, and this was only in the first five minutes of battle. Another issue is the complete degradation of the human language. Contact with Earth has been so scarce, that soldiers are even forgetting how to speak properly. The authors were thoroughly baffled when reading their own reports. An example is shown in the following excerpt:

Doodz, w3 b3l21v3 7HA7 7h3 07heR 73Am HAX.

A rough translation in English would be: "We believe that the other team is cheating." Though even when translated, the comment is still baffling.

The authors also find it disturbing about the incredible amount of friendly fire incidents every day. The causes for some of these incidents are unclear, though there have been confirmed cases of teammates shooting one another out of irrational anger, road rage, premeditated murder, and random killings. However, these incidents are a small percentage of the total number of friendly fire incidents. The majority of friendly fire is the result of accidents or incompetence, which does not help the situation.

Finally, there are some nagging inconsistencies on camp operations. For example, in Camp X, soldiers on special ops missions are allowed to bring at least one fellow soldier to assist them. However, in Camp P, such an action is not allowed. The authors find this ban unethical and unfair to those soldiers of Camp P.

**Conclusions**: The authors recommend that all future training emphasize the importance of battlefield etiquette to improve the manners of recruits. More specifically, more officers and NCOs should be trained for an effective chain of command. There must be stricter punishments for rude and treasonous behavior, and the English language must be kept from becoming extinct. We feel it is as much a victim of this war as the countless planets that were glassed. On a brighter note, it appears that the Covenant stationed here are suffering from the exact same problems.

_**Training**_

**Observations: **Upon further review, it was imperative that the authors gauge the combat prowess of the troops stationed here. To do this, the authors observed the troops' performance during one of the larger scale battles. The results were rather depressing.

First and foremost were the soldiers' lack of marksmanship. Even with the aid of the HUD crosshair, most soldiers still lack the ability to make accurate shots at distance. Actually, many lacked the ability to make accurate shots at _point blank_ distances as well. Testing the weapons ourselves, we discovered that the weapons were similar, if not identical, to the ones we use on our sector of the front. They are just as accurate and powerful, and they are even equipped with the updated battle rifle, which comes with the 2x scope as a standard. There is no excuse as to why none of these soldiers can hit a moving target at 50 yards with a battle rifle, yet the problem persists. There are, however, some exceptions. There are a number of soldiers who are decent shots, and a very rare few who have amazing accuracy and do not use any kind of performance-enhancing drug or implant.

Driving is also a skill that appears to have been taken for granted. Often times, soldiers have obvious difficulty maneuvering these vehicles, especially on tight turns, narrow spaces, or hills. The funny thing is that it appears the drivers look as if they're trying to drive the vehicle with their thumbs, or even a keyboard, which is not the best way to handle a Warthog going over sixty miles per hour. There are also multiple instances of soldiers being run over by friendly vehicles. Often times, the drivers do not have the skill to steer or brake properly, or even remember which stick position is drive or reverse. The authors counted at least fifteen dead friendly soldiers at the start of the engagement, when the driver of a Warthog whipped around a corner at full speed and did not bother to stop for the group of soldiers in front of him.

There is also the obvious lack of any tactics. Often enough, most battles devolve into Napoleonic-style slugfests, where the opposing armies meet each other head-on and attempt to brute-force their way to the other side of the battlefield. Other tactics being pursued are just plain silly, such as what the soldiers deem as "bunny hopping". It is basically just jumping up and down as you move, in hopes that the repetitive movement will throw your opponent's aim off long enough to protect yourself. Other than that, most tactics involve suicidal frontal attacks with complete disregard for their own lives.

**Conclusions** Budgets and programs for recruit training need to be greatly expanded, with emphasis focused on marksmanship, driving ability, and tactical thinking. At this current rate, the existing soldiers would not be able to shoot or retaliate in a proper fashion, leading to many humiliating defeats, regardless of how well individual soldiers perform.

_**Weaponry and Equipment**_

**Observations:** First and foremost, the author's would like to point out the gross misconduct concerning the proper handling of weapons. The authors have discovered that loaded weapons are left on the ground and neglected, allowing any passing soldier, human or Covenant, to pick it up for their own personal use. Many of the weapons carelessly left out include, but are not restricted to: pistols, battle rifles, plasma weaponry, plasma swords, grenades, and even rocket launchers. This obvious negligence in weapons care is distressing and requires immediate attention. Also, after much observation, the authors have noted that the exact same weapons are left in the exact same spots on a consistent basis, leading the authors to suspect repeat offenders.

There is also the odd phenomena of weapons that refuse to run out of ammunition. For example, the authors "commandeered" a Warthog with a 30 mm chaingun mounted in the rear. The authors proceeded to fire it at a rock, and the gun has continued firing for at least three days now without any signs of expending bullets, overheating, or wear and tear. The authors are thoroughly baffled by this apparent break in the laws of physics, and encourage whoever was responsible for this development to keep working.

The authors would also like to report on the poor storage and distribution of firearms. All soldiers are given the basic weapons loadout of one submachine gun, and, unless they want to try and kill mosquitoes, are often left to acquire additional weaponry on their own. This is a problem, due to the fact that we stated earlier that most available weapons are left lying on the ground. This has led to ugly instances of packs of soldiers both friendly and hostile, fighting viciously over a patch of land that holds no strategic value other than the fact that it is where somebody keeps dropping the rocket launcher.

On that note, the authors would like to point out one of the biggest mistakes that the command has made so far. Having to actually _downgrade_ a weapon is a baffling and stupid way to arm troops. The M6C magnum is inferior to the previously used M6D pisol in almost every way. It lacks the stopping power of an M6D, the accuracy, and most of all, the handy mini-scope that came with the pistol. The authors are fortunate in that they have kept their own M6Ds from previous conflicts, and have no reason to swap them out for an inferior replacement.

Another observation is the authors would like to note is the decision to equip soldiers with a flashlight. The authors fail to see the reasoning behind this, since none of the operations here take place at night. In fact, none of the areas we have seen are dimly lit, leading the authors to question the uses of the flashlight. Though the authors are aware of the priceless contributions flashlights have provided on the campaigns in Black Mesa and Mars, it is probably better to dump the flashlight and replace it with more useful equipment, such as duct tape.

One final observation the authors would like to note are the various alien items scattered throughout the battlefields. These devices, affectionately known as "overshields" and "cloaks" are scattered in various areas around the field, very much like the various weapons that can be found. These provide special benefits to any soldier lucky enough to come across these little treasures, and is highly recommended that these item are to be used immediately upon discovery.

**Conclusion: **There must be better training on how to properly handle and care for weapons to prevent negligent soldiers from leaving them laying around for the enemy to find. Also, the quartermasters should see fit to keep a better eye on inventory so that our troops are not stuck with puny submachine guns. Finally, the combat effectiveness of the flashlight in this campaign is questionable, and is recommended that it be replaced with something far more valuable.

_**Vehicles**_

**Observations: **There have been many complaints among the soldiers that vehicles "are not as durable as they used to be." Many complain that recently, their vehicles have now been taking damage and actually being destroyed. Upon further review, the authors discovered that many of the older soldiers used to blow up and launch their own vehicles for recreation, since the initial explosion and inevitable fall did not seem to even scratch the vehicles one bit. Some soldiers have even made videos of themselves launching Warthogs hundreds of feet into the air. The authors are unsure how this sudden degradation took place, but suspect that it had something to do with lowering costs.

Another problem is the issue of theft. Recently, there have been spikes of vehicle jackings by both sides. Apparently, some anonymous soldier had the bright idea of leaping onto the hood of an enemy vehicle, tossing the driver out, and then commandeering the vehicle for himself. This form of vehicle jacking has becoming something of a fad, with many soldiers trying to pull it off every day. Unfortunately, none of these soldiers seem to know what the consequences of facing down a two-ton vehicle reaching top speeds of 90 miles per hour are, and they can be very messy.

There is also the unexplainable phenomena that allows normal soldiers to flip vehicles like Warthogs and even Scorpion tanks with little apparent effort. This is probably due to the planet's lower than normal gravity, which could also account for the odd "hang time" that occurs during jumps. However, this is not confirmed.

On a positive note, the authors would like to applaud the diligence of the quartermaster division in this area. Whenever a vehicle is lost, stolen, or destroyed, that vehicle is replaced very quickly, often in the pace of seconds. Now, if the quartermaster division can show similar results in our other theatres of war, we would undoubtedly win it.

**Conclusion**: Vehicles must be properly maintained and cared for. Also, the authors recommend that we switch back to the old manufacturer, as their product is far superior to the current one in the fact that it is not as easily destroyed.

_**Final Conclusion**_

In the author's personal opinion, all of the soldiers stationed here deserve to be shot on the post. However, due to manpower shortages, the armed forces must make do with what it has. The authors have found the soldiers here to be rude, dirty, incompetent, mean, savage, and unsociable. The authors' only consolation is that this issue is also prevalent among the Covenant here as well. The authors recommend that the army here take a full retooling and retraining program, and that they are to be replaced by crack combat troops. With experienced men who know what they are doing, it would only be a matter of hours before the Covenant in the entire sector are routed. The authors truly believe that with enough attention and will, this campaign will end in just a matter of days, even hours. To whomever is reading this report, please take these observations and considerations seriously.


End file.
